Wednesday, December 26, 2012

Traditions...

     I'm humming Tradition from "Fiddler on the Roof" as I'm writing this...  I love that movie.  I was thinking about it the other night as I drove around town looking at Christmas lights... thinking of the memories I have in this place.  Holidays past and of the traditions I've held close to my heart as being part of who I am.

     All told, I have roughly twenty plus years of memories in Panama City.  High school graduation... first and last loves... birthdays... first dog... Thanksgivings... Christmases.  Even when I wasn't living here, I would sometimes come back to see my Dad while he was alive.

     I drove past my Dad's old house tonight.  I could see the new owner's Christmas tree through the front window but they didn't have any lights up outside.  No one on the street did.  What a change that was from when I lived there as a child.  I remember almost every house on the street being lit up.

     As I turned off the street and headed for town, a thought occurred to me...

Sometimes in order to move forward,
we have to take a step back
to remember who we are.
     I'm back to square one in my life.  I came "home" to Panama City after a devastating time to ... I don't know.  Get my feet back on the ground again?  I took a step backwards so that I could move forward.
     Because I have to let go.  I have to let go of my past... of what has happened... so that I can turn my focus to tomorrow.  To be able to enjoy today and move forward.   I can still hang onto my traditions... my rituals... because they give me a foundation.  They are my beliefs.  My faith.  But some of the memories have to be rewritten.  The pain erased.
     So that there is room for the memories tomorrow will bring...

1 comment:

  1. Stepping back, grounding yourself, and getting ready to take confident strides into the future sounds very good indeed.

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for stopping by and reading my words...

All comments are moderated, so they will not appear immediately.