Thursday, November 21, 2013

without words ...

The days have been flying by. Work takes up ten hours between getting there and getting home.  If I'm lucky, I might get eight hours of intermittent sleep (most of that spent worrying about things happening at work).  That leaves me six hours a day to "be" ... be a wife, be a dog & cat mom, be a writer, or just be me.  Even weekends seem to be crammed full of things to do ... playing catch-up during the week.

Something always slips through the cracks.

Sometime over last weekend, Oreo brought a friend home for dinner ... and forgot to eat her.  Monday morning I found the stiff carcass of a squirrel stashed behind the television when I tracked down that funky smell of decomp.  Thank goodness for lavender scented Pine Sol.

I'm still trying to finish reading "a million little ways" and am down to the last two chapters.  One quote has stuck in my mind and I keep going back to it again and again.  Apparently it is something that resonates deep within me.

"But your would would be different if you were not in it.  And your brave yes might just be what we're waiting for.  Yes, I will believe, I will move, I will open my eyes, I will show up." 
["a million little ways" by Emily P. Freeman p170]

Words have escaped me.  I read blogs, emails, and books ... and feel my own words creeping in and out of the shadows.  I start to write ... and stop.  Questioning whether or not I need to speak.  There are times when I feel I've said too much ... revealed too much of my soul.  I suppose this is what they call a writer's block, but it isn't that I can't think of what to say ... the block is self-imposed.  More like a gate that I've closed.

"But if she begins to feel compelled to ration it, to hoard, and hold her art tightly in both hands, it might be time to sink into God again.  It might be time to be still, to break the alabaster jar that holds her sweet-smelling gift and release the art back into the hands of God."
["a million little ways" by Emily P. Freeman p162]

I'm making a point to sink again ... but this time with hope ... faith ... love ... and a yes.

1 comment:

  1. Welcome back, and I hope that gate swings open gently, freely opening up the vistas beyond...


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