Thursday, March 19, 2020

wilting ~ WoW

Words for Wednesday is a moveable feast of participants. Each month the prompts ~ words, pictures, themes, or even phrases are provided by someone new. The aim of the words is to encourage us to write. A story, a poem, whatever comes to mind. In March, the words will be provided by Mark Koopmans and posted on The Elephant's Child blog.

     [rapid knocking on the door]
     "Ocupado."
     [more rapid pounding on the door]
     "Lo siento, pero este baño está ocupado!"

     I instantly regretted taking this mini-vacation to Gibraltar, but after a long winter, I was deserving of at least a long weekend of sunlight.  For too many years, my business dogma had always been that work was a priority over everything else.  But lately, the search into my family tree and the recent pandemic had made me think twice about what was truly important.  Especially after a conversation with my siblings.

     [My younger and very spoiled sister] "Well, I hope you don't think we're going to come to Wisconsin to help you with this foolish project of yours.  Who cares what Uncle has done?!?"
     "I care.  For some reason, the thought of how many people he has harmed over the years has given me a particular drive to find him and hold him responsible for what he has done.  Not only to them but to our family name."
     [My one-year-younger brother] "Reggie, you act as if you have a tiny jockey on your back who is kicking you with his spurs.  Why such a sense of urgency with this nonsense?"
     "That was not quite the image I was hoping for, but I'll take it if it makes you understand why I want you to help me find him.  To be honest, it feels more like I have a wisteria vine strangling me, and I'm desperately trying to keep our family tree from wilting under the scandal that this might cause."
     [My very direct one-year-older brother] "You know, Regs, the last time I saw you, your color was very ashen.  I think you've been working too hard and need to take a vacation.  I've had my secretary schedule a flight for you that leaves tomorrow for Gibraltar.  I expect you to be on it.  Ever since this silly Brexit business, I've been trying to get down there to see how several of my investments have been doing.  I'll meet you there the day after tomorrow."

     Now, here I was trapped in a toilet with some maniac banging on the door.  I could hear him muttering as he paced just outside.  I'd had enough of this stress that was not helping the pressure currently occupying my bowels.  I was supposed to be relaxing in the sun.  I screamed loudly.

     "COLGATE!!!"

     Silence.  Then footsteps walking away.

     I smoothed my shirt and ran water over my face and hair so that I didn't look quite as strained as I had just been.  Stopping into the Gibraltar Distillery had been an unplanned detour, but when nature calls, you often don't have a choice of where you choose to answer.  Opening the door, I stepped out and was surprised to see a large crowd of women glaring at me with their arms crossed.  The elegance of their attire did not match the anger and disgust in their faces.

     A hand gripped my elbow firmly and pulled me out of the hallway and into the lobby of the distillery.

     "Disculpe, señor, pero ha estado ocupando el baño de mujeres durante casi una hora."

     I turned to look at the closed door behind me, and felt my face burn with embarrassment as I saw the sign that said "Mujer."  A voice behind me boomed loudly.

     "Regs!  There you are!  I've been looking everywhere for you.  I was afraid that with your flighty sense of obligation you might have missed the plane yesterday just to peeve me.  There's been quite the uproar here as some fool locked himself in the ladies' toilet and was simply being explosive in his bowel movements.  We've been hearing and smelling him for most of an hour now.  Positively repugnant!  I'd ask if you've been on the tour yet but have been informed that they are going to have to close the distillery for the rest of the day now to fumigate and sterilize the entire building.  Oh my, you are quite red in the face.  You should have used sunscreen, my dear brother.  It is not a flattering look on you."

6 comments:

  1. Oh, poor guy. Great post. I feel his embarrassment.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Oops. Thanks for the laugh. I had not realized that your main person was male :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. As promised, a lighter take on the words from last week.

      Delete
  3. Snort.
    A fun take on Mark's difficult prompts.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Colgate was a challenge until I discovered that in Spanish it means "go hang yourself" and that set the tone for the entire story.

      Delete
  4. Oh, dear. That is a danger when you aren't too sure of the language, or don't take the time to read the sign. Hope the trip gets better quickly.

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for stopping by and catching my words!